Sometimes being a writer can be all work and no play. Remember Jack Torrance in the Shining?*shudders. With misbehaving clients, book critics and over zealous editors, we have plenty to stress about. So, if you’re having one of those days then take 5 minutes out for a little light refreshment. Here’s my 10 funniest writer quotes.
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If Moses were alive today he’d come down from the mountain with the Ten Commandments and spend the next five years trying to get them published.
– Anonymous
If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.
– Doug Larson
Me in the early freelance years: Stranger: Oh, you’re a writer! Have you written anything I may have read? Me: Depends. How well read are you on the top ten tips for hiring a professional carpet cleaning service in Manchester?
– Kelly Dunning
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How many writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Six:
One to screw it in,
One to sharpen all the pencils in the house,
One to make more coffee,
One to call a friend to chat,
And one to complain that there’s never time to do any writing.
Wait, that’s only five — that’s why they need editors.
-Anon
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It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by that time I was too famous.
– Robert Benchley
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I was sorry to hear my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I am not feeling very well myself.
– Mark Twain
Do you have a favourite funny writer quote? Tweet me @Charli_Says and share it with me.